Kept Dad Takes a Holiday

Who knew blogging was so strenuous? After spending so much time writing all of those, make that both of these posts, it's time to take a break, so I'm going to Disneyland tomorrow. I'm like that annoying guy at the office who gets hired for the position you applied for and immediately goes on vacation, leaving you to cover for him while he lounges on a beach somewhere and collects a paycheck he has yet to earn. In my defense, we have been planning this trip to Disneyland for over a year now, having postponed it a couple of times already, and would like to go while the kids are still young enough to willingly be seen with their parents in public, and will (grudgingly) submit to the humiliation of being photographed with Mickey and Goofy without harboring eternal resentment because of it.

I am exciting but nervous about this trip. While I'm sure it will be a wonderful time filled with plenty of family fun, it will also certainly have its equal share of stress. In some sort of Newtonian law of family physics, it seems that for every enjoyable family action, there is an equal and opposite unpleasant reaction. Your kids laughing and playing outside in the afternoon is balanced by them squabbling over what T.V. show they want to watch that evening. A pleasant family dinner is countered by whining about there not being anything they like for dessert. I'm sure when we're in Disneyland that one minute we'll be relaxing on the Jungle Cruise taking pictures of the animatronic elephants , and the next minute we'll be listening to complaints about how they don't want to go on It's a Small World because it's too babyish. As a kept dad, I feel a certain responsibility for keeping these reactions to minimum. I plan to work overtime on this trip so my wife can relax and enjoy her vacation. She's been working overtime all weekend, just so she can get caught up on all her projects and take a few days off without coming back swamped in work. This vacation is only possible because of all the airline and hotel points she has earned through her many business trips, so I feel like I need to contribute by doing whatever I can to make it as relaxing and stress-free as possible.

I must admit, I also feel some trepidation at the expense of this trip. Not to say that I am a cheapskate but...well okay, my wife is saying I am a cheapskate. While our flights and rooms are taken care of by airline and hotel points, the park passes, rental car, food, souvenirs, etc. are sure to cost well over a thousand dollars, depleting our savings and hastening the day of reckoning when my time as a kept dad will come to an end.
 

So don't fear all of my...er, both of my...um, my sole reader. I will be taking a break, but I will return next week. I suppose if I had a cellphone that had been made sometime in the past decade I could probably blog on the go, but I stubbornly cling to my cheap, no-contract flip phone like a family heirloom I can't bear to part with. I've had the same rate plan since 1997, which may as well be from the paleolithic era in technology terms. That would also explain why there is no Kept Dad Twitter feed. I'm sure this trip will provide plenty of fodder for future blogging when I get back. I'm off to the happiest place on earth, but soon will return to the happiest blog on earth.